The Art of Being Uncomfortable

 It’s no secret that as humans we don’t enjoy lying in our own agony. That no one wants to feel lost or out of place. But what happens when this state is the only way to not fall or fail? To reach a potential one could only ever imagine? 

The people around me know that it is no secret that I am one of the most awkward and uncomfortable individuals that you will ever meet. However, there is a reason for this. The biggest way to become stagnant, to be caught off guard, or even to get your heart ripped out of your chest is this – to be comfortable. Experiencing this firsthand I have learned to thrive in the pressures of life, realizing that this is the easiest ways to grow and reach the potential of the person you genuinely want to be. I am sure you have also endured this experience of being vulnerable and in consequence paying the price, it is why you are here. This post is not to say to never be vulnerable or comfortable around the valuable relations in your life, but instead to continue to challenge yourself. By living in what I will describe as the art of being uncomfortable, you are able to better strive for who and what you want to be even when caught off guard, a way of constantly testing and reaching your full potential. 

So, what is the “art of being uncomfortable”? Simply, it is knowing the scale between too little and too much challenge in your life, and living in between in order to properly push yourself to constantly being the best version of yourself. Now, this is not something easy and figuring out this scale, the perfect balance will likely come with moments of failure. There will be times where you push too far, fall off, burn out, etc. The key is continuing even after. Of course, no one wants to go through this burning out period, so what are some ways we can begin to push ourselves without failing? There is no solution or hack to this, simply trial and error, but here I will share with you tips I have learned and hopefully you can begin, continuing to learn alongside me. 

Know Yourself – Strengths, Weaknesses, Goals 

Now, knowing yourself is something I’ve mentioned in past posts, however, that doesn’t make it any less valuable. The best way to become your ideal self is to know your current self. What’re you good at? Bad at? What do you want to be? To value? To prioritize? There is little point in striving to be “better” when you don’t know what this “better” even looks like. This is not to say that you have to know every aspect of yourself and your future but have in mind where you are versus where you’re working to be. 

Decide on Small Things You Can Add to Your Daily Life 

Living in a state of constant uneasiness is not, well, easy. The fastest way to throw yourself over the edge, and most common mistake (guilty myself) is to add too much, too fast. It is important to start slow in adding discomfort into your life. Personally, I needed to start small, I added little habits every day that I knew I had trouble keeping up with in the past. Habits go beyond living in the uncomfortable but they’re the most basic building blocks for creating the life you want.  

Here are a few to start with: 

• Journaling 

• Working out 

• Eating healthy 

• Keeping a calendar or agenda 

• Making your bed 

• Reading nightly 

These are only a very select few, and though this may not seem like something challenging or significant, each habit you hold in your life reflects you and your values. If you want to be more organized making your bed or creating a calendar is a great way to start. Maybe this seems too easy, not enough uncomfortable, but it is not this alone that creates this art. 

Add “Deadlines” to Longer Term Goals 

Building off of the previous steps, the next is similar, only increasing the scale. Previously we discussed how to improve in daily life, now we address improving over a longer timeline. Go back to step one, what is one of your weaknesses or something you dislike in yourself? How does this compare to who you want to be? And how will you get there? Figure out the answers to these questions and do this: create a timeline on this goal.  

Let's go back to the example that you want to be an organized individual. Now while the reasons on why you aren’t may vary; I am just looking at a common situation many of us find ourselves in. Maybe your computer files are a mess and out of date, your pantry is full of expired goods, and there is a stack of paper that has been piling up at your desk for years now. Whatever the case, you’ve probably been putting these things off because they seem daunting, but it is now time to hold yourself accountable. Decide on a day where you will complete these goals and stick to it, whether that’s in a couple days or months, mark it on your calendar and do it. 

Be Consistent, Don’t Give Up 

If you couldn’t tell by now, all of these steps have something in common – consistency and accountability. I would argue that this is the most important part, and what really makes the art of being uncomfortable. It is easy to say you are going to add the previous steps to your life. It is easy to on a bad day say that it's okay to miss a habit or push back a deadline. It's not easy to get up every day and do everything you told yourself you would. If you can’t be consistent and disciplined with this, you won’t reach who you want to be. Holding yourself accountable is hard, maybe even uncomfortable, but it is absolutely vital. I wish there was a life hack to this, a tip, or 3 step process – there isn’t. You simply have to do it yourself and do it again. 

It’s okay to fall off, to get too uncomfortable, or lost in the process. What isn’t okay is giving up or staying lost. When you are dedicated to living in this state you will not only see the strides in progress towards who you want to be but will gain so much more. You will gain more out of your day, your relations, yourself, and what I love most, a support for all your failings. Living in this art of being uncomfortable allows you to have something to fall back on when life throws the inevitable curve balls your way. Once you learn how to live in this state, even if you stop, there is a security in it that you can always come back to, always pick back up. Even when it seems you have no one around you, you have this, you have yourself. So, I encourage you to start, to live in the uncomfortable encasing of life. At the end of the day, it could never be worse than price you’ve paid before.